well I might have got it. we will see. A friend said to try this
shut off all breakers, tightened all screws with wires, cleaned the 5 amp fuse in box. replaced filter ( did not need less than 2 months old) turned everything back on, and all is going ok now
but it could also be luck and not fixed, maybe I reset something by shutting everything down. friend said it could be my thermostat.
so It would still be good to get ideas in case it does it again .