An automotive polishing compound may bring it back.
I have even used car wax to protect the finish on tubs and appliances.
SOS pads should be used on surfaces that are harder than newer fiberglass and acrylic finished products. They're just too harsh for many finishes now.
I hope this works out for you. It's a bad situation when your significant other gets upset, when your trying to do the right thing.
If the tub will not polish out, there are tub refinishers out there, It may be cheaper to have a pro refinish what you have, rather than to try to replace it. That would be the perfect opportunity to change the color also.
Welcome to the forum,
you may not have wrecked the tub just yet..
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