OK, gurus, I need some advise. I have a 15' x 15' five sided patio with rough sawn wood. I purchased the house and the patio was in good shape, and all stained a nice color. Since I added a new roof last week, the roofer needed to tear out about 50 sq ft of the old 1" x 6" shiplap, and all I need to do is to stain this small portion, which is the underside of the roof, all in nice, exposed lumber. Please do not drink anything for the next minute until you finish reading what I am about to type, because you will probably spit out what is in your mouth because of excessive laughter. I purchased two quarts of penetrating stain by Minwax this morning. I set up a brand new 10' x 12' drop cloth, so I wouldn't make a mess anywhere...or at least I thought. You see, I began by ragging on the finish. Since it is new rough sawn 1" x 6" shiplap wood, the cloth snagged everything. I then went to a 2" brush. I dipped it and the stain went right down my arm into my armpit. I then went to a 4" brush, and same thing, it just ran down my arm, belly and legs. I then decided to get smart. I put 2 quarts of stain into a brand new Thompson sprayer. I tighten the flow to just a small flow, and went to town. I got about 2 square feet into it, and the sprayer took on a life if its own, and started spraying everywhere. I pulled my finger off the trigger and set it down to wipe off the excess stain, which hit my floor, the stucco wall and my plants, only to discover that the trigger locked on and I had stain everywhere, including inside the screens of my Milgard windows! I frantically began to wipe the stain off the floor at about the same time that the 2 square feet of stain collected in the center, and started dripping into my hair, my back, and even the crack of my arse. Well, I just about had enough of this stain crap. I poured the two cans of stain back into their original cans, threw the Thompson sprayer the 2 brushes, the 3 stained rags, and my shoes into the center of this now destroyed 10' x 12', and went inside to take a shower. OK, done laughing? Now, could someone please advise me how the hell to finish staining the underside of this roof, so I can move on to replacing the plants, repainting the stucco, buying new shoes, and making up with my better half after yelling at her because of my stupidity?