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@oldognewtrick I've given up on the premise of even attempting to please or to agree with friends or colleagues. I start with the premise of mutual respect: I respect them and their views and will do so as long as they reciprocate. It is totally fine to disagree and even have pointed discussions on the topics, but disrespect is not ok.
Feeling provoked because you disagree with your friend is normal. The question you need to ask yourself is whether that is because of his position on the topic or his attitude toward you. If the former, then you need to focus on the "educational" exchange between friends and calm down. If the latter, then check if that disrespect and if they are a friend worth keeping/staying around.
I've found over the years, and in most topics that I tend to disagree with people, that I know more about their position than them and they are usually largely ignorant about the opposing (typically mine) view. Being able to see both sides make me clear eyed. So, try to
calmly (easier said than done sometimes) inform them of both sides. If they latch on to information on their side and simply ignore whenever you say something about your view then they are too closed-minded and a lost case on this topic. Forget about the topic and move on with the friendship if you can.